Thursday, 8 November 2012

First kiss blues... a hero's woes

One week into #NaNoWriMo and astonishingly, I think I am ON TRACK.  A few things have helped with this:

  • Knowing my characters really well
  • Bothering to spend an evening trying to map out a rough sort of plot (even pantsers need a roadmap)
  • The cheerleaders, wordmongerers and sprinters of #NaNoWriMo land. 
I love you people. Really, I do. You make me laugh and most importantly, write. *squishy great big hug to the world* 

So to celebrate a successful week 1, here is an extract from my WIP Banshee. This is brand new stuff - a big departure from the original way I'd mapped my protagonists' relationship developing. It's also unedited. Be kind!

In this scene Devlin kisses Tara, but her reaction isn't quite what he was hoping for:

(gratuitous Richard Armitage picture)

    For one wonderful moment she responded, her mouth feverish. Then she tensed. He felt her rejection the split second it froze her body.  His stomach sank like lead.  Insensitive, cack-handed bastard.  Instantly, he stepped back letting space get between them, his chest rising and falling with the shudder of his breaths. She stared at him blindly, as though seeing someone else, somewhere else.
    Tara?  Are you okay?”
    Her pale hair clung around her face, she was milk white, her eyes huge and shadowed.  She blinked.  “I’m sorry,” she said. 
    “Jesus don’t be sorry, I never should have-”
    “I’m sorry, I need to go.”  She slipped past him out of the door as he stood dumbfounded. 
    “Wait. Wait a minute.  Where can you go?  At least let me call you a cab?”
    She glanced at him and her expression reminded him of a wild creature trapped in a cage. “I need to go.”
    “Fuck. Fine, let me take you home.  Is there someone I can call?”
    “He’s here.  He’s already here.”
    “My broth-”
    Before she finished the word the doorbell rang. 


    Bullish said...

    Oh, MEG!!! You are so so so cruel to leave us hanging!! This is wonderful! Ackkkk!! Not sure my snippet is up to snuff now!!! Oh, but this, this is just so intense and well paced and just so freaking spot on!!! Gah!! I'm all blabberly excitedly stumbly WOW!!!


    Unknown said...

    LOVE IT!!!!

    The build up and pace was wonderful, really understood the characters emotions, great writing. Keep it up :)

    Lisa Shambrook said...

    Definitely full of tension...I can see him pulling back and running his fingers through his hair in frustration at himself! Very vivid!

    Miranda Kate said...

    Ooo, you left us hanging! Hopefully next weeks post will explain more! Great stuff!

    Stacy Bennett said...

    Oooh I got shivers, Meg. Really. You can get so much angst in so short a space, it's amazing. I love this!! Cant wait for next week!

    Sophie Moss said...

    Nicely done, Meg! I can't believe this is an unedited first kiss scene. It reads clean and succinct and the emotion is very believable. I'm excited for this story! And you know I couldn't resist a Richard Armitage pic. :)

    Diane J. Reed said...

    LOVE THIS, Meg!! Your characters are already wonderfully complex and the tension is as tight as a drum. Yes, it might be stressful, but so far you're quite victorious with your NANOWRIMO efforts (you brave soul--someday I'll have to try it : ) MORE PLEASE!

    Meg McNulty said...

    Thank you for the encouragement everyone - I'm doing my best to WRITE ON! Diane, next you you've got to give it a whirl. It's so fun!