Tuesday, 3 January 2012

To resolve or not to resolve, that is the question

New Year's Resolutions - do you do them? 

I've got writing goals.  You can see them in my previous post.  But what about everything else?

It's easy for me to set myself writing goals.  I like writing.  It's easy for me to set career goals.  You can plan careers.

But what about everything else?   To be honest, it's the everything else I struggle with the most.  November/December 2011 found me with a bad ass chest infection which had me coughing like I was auditioning for a bit part as a workhouse consumptive.

Okay, I might have developed that anyway.  But it sure didn't help that I was working my arse off in the day job, trying to be a good mummy, writing half the night.  Burning the candle at both ends and in the middle. It's not difficult for me to be manic.  I'm all boom and bust, me (see Supersonic Workaholic).  One week I'm Madame Productivity, churning out fundraising proposals, novel chapters, goddamn victoria sponge cakes - you name it.  The next week I'm propping my eyelids open with match sticks.

There's a bit of me that likes it.  It is, after all, a mega buzz when you're superhuman for a day or two.  Call me Wonder Woman why don't you.  But it isn't serene.  When I'm like that I think too fast and I talk too fast.  And I push my body to the point where it latches onto the galloping consumption with a sigh of relief, desperate for a few hours of back to back CSI and a mug of hot chocolate.

So health, that's one thing.

Personal relationships, that's another.  When I'm working my arse off, I'm not thinking about myself and I'm not thinking about my loved ones (my baby excepted, she always gets a look in).  My beloved is neglected, my friends get manic me, talking ten to the dozen, wild eyed and frantic.  I'm not thoughtful.

Administration.  That's what has prompted this, really.  Sitting down to do ONE YEAR'S worth of book keeping.  Preparing my sodding accounts, two months late.

I'm a shocker for administration.  I lose bank cards like pounds of flesh from the Slimmer of the Year.  I forget pin numbers.  I don't monitor my bills.  I don't keep my books.  I put off and put off and put off.   And let's not even get started on housework.

So resolutions for 2012.  Non-writing resolutions.

To bloody well take a chill pill.  That's it, really.  Slow down.

Carpe Diem is all very well, but stuff needs done.  Heads need ironed out.  Friends and family need time, love and attention.  My bank cards need to be put back in their purse.  I need *sigh* to clean the damn house.  And I need to sit back, reflect, watch CSI and have bath.

So what if it takes longer for me to improve?  So what if I don't get all those writing goals nailed by March?

They'll keep.

It's about responsibility on all fronts.  It's about kindness.  It's about serenity.

So my one resolution for 2012:  chill.

Or find a cunning way to lure Mary Poppins into my household.  Mary, I need you.  It's windy outside, I'll leave the door open.

For a great advice on resolutions, check our Michelle Woodall's blog over at Life Planning.


Andrea said...

You know one of the many mantras I tell myself is that you can do a lot in ten minutes.
Ten minutes to clean, ten minutes to put your feet up and think calming thoughts. Ten minutes to write. Ten minutes to think about a problem. Ten minutes to practice the piano. Ten minutes to find one form for the accounts.

You might think that there isn't any point if you can't sit down and do the job properly, but it really is suprising how much you can get done, and how good you feel for just doing that little bit each day. And it all adds up. That's what I do. I managed ten minutes on the clarinet today and five minutes of the viola. You wouldn't think it was worth it, but I was better today than I was yesterday and I will be better again today. It just takes time and I don't worry how long that final goal will take.

It'll all work out.

Meg McNulty said...

Thank you, that is a GOOD mantra! It's all about balance :-)